Fashion is something that I have grown to be extremely passionate about because it allows me to express myself freely and be open-minded. It's a great form of self-expression and I cherish the amount of fluidity in the art form because it reduces the pressure of societal perfection and beauty standards. For instance, whenever I am shopping or want to experiment with my wardrobe I can go all out and be unique instead of trying to fit in and only wearing the latest trendy clothes. With self-expression, I can present myself as whoever I want to be, and hopefully, that person is always mentally and emotionally happy. But first, what is self-expression and what does it look like? Self-expression is a mix of art and values and can look different for every individual. For instance, an individual can express feelings, ideas, passions, etc. through self-expression. In the LGBTQ+, self-expression is a vital and cherished practice and it's popularly expressed through physical presentation such as fashion; its fluidity offers comfort and guidance to those shaping their identity, questioning, experimenting, etc. Additionally, Drag is an influential form of self-expression within the LGBTQ+ community. The art created in these spaces heavily utilizes fashion and makeup to exaggerate one's looks and present the perfect persona. Self-expressive spaces in the LGBTQ+ community have been at risk since they were introduced into society. However, advocates, organizers, protesters, and allies have worked hard to ensure these spaces remain alive and can be practiced safely. Furthermore, as a member of the LGBTQ+ community and aspiring fashion stylist, I seek to build another safe fashion space for queer individuals and other unprivileged communities looking for inclusive clothing in size, range, price, material, and presentation. I plan to build this space as a fashion boutique with the knowledge gained from majoring in Fashion Merchandising at my university. I enjoy helping others feel comfortable in their skin and assisting them on their self-expression journey because I have experienced the struggle of trying to find clothes that made me feel comfortable in my skin for a long time and I also know how mentally and emotionally taxing it is searching for clothes as a plus size person. From middle to high school, I constantly felt like I would have to buy clothes that would make me appear "feminine enough" to societal standards as a plus-size Black woman, but now I know that is not true. Regardless, the fashion industry does not make flattering clothes for plus-size individuals and if a brand does have nice plus-size clothing, then it more often than not is not affordable or worse, it's fast fashion. With this in mind, I plan to use my education and experience as an unprivileged individual to make an affordable and inclusive fashion brand for unprivileged communities like the LGBTQ+, plus-size, and Black communities.

I've never had a supportive father figure, but I have always had a supportive mom. My mother is the type of person who never gives up, even though she has gone through many hardships and losses. She is the type of mother who jumps out of a burning building to save their infant even if it means breaking her foot and still feeling memories of the pain 18 years later. She is the type of mom who will buy her queer daughter a "love is love" bracelet to show her allyship. She is also the type of mother who works two jobs to make sure her kids can live comfortably. This is my mother. My mother has raised, encouraged, and supported me and my two brothers as a single parent. She never got to pursue her dreams of going into the medical field or culinary school because my nana held her back and did not support her dreams. I know that my mom regrets not being able to make alternative life decisions that could have led her to live a finer life in one of those professions, so she provides me and my siblings with whatever she can so that we can succeed. Although, my mom is unable to offer much financially, her words of affirmation and encouragement would put any motivational speaker out of a job. Whether I am distressed at school, work, or home, the first person that I call is my mom because she always knows how to say the right thing, even if it may not be something that I want to hear at the moment. I came to understand this after a considerable amount of "aha moments" when reflecting on my own and realizing that her advice had always been right. Giving advice isn't the only my mom is gifted at. She has given me one of the greatest gifts she never received from her mother, the ability to attend school out-of-state. My mother has supported my dream of continuing my education in a place where I feel comfortable, and have the opportunity to meet new people and explore. I did not want to attend school in my home state because of the horrible experiences I have had at the schools and I have always wanted a fresh start, to move somewhere else. Somewhere where I could be myself and not be forced to live according to someone else's narrative. With this in mind, the toughest decision was not applying to a university out-of-state, instead it was finding a school. My search for the 'perfect' school was hectic, but I eventually applied to a private school in Chicago, later getting accepted. I was so ecstatic to have received an acceptance letter; I got into a good university, I got scholarships, and my mother was proud of me. My mother assisted me with my application and my search for the school, thanks to her I was able to find such a great school in a safer part of Chicago and excellent for Entrepreneurship Majors, which was my major at the time. Thankfully even though I changed my major to Advertising Creative, I still have access to a good education and academic resources. Moreover, I am extremely grateful to my mother because she has helped me conquer many battles with friends, family, and myself. I could never ask for a better mother who constantly tells me that she is proud of me and does whatever she can to help me follow my dreams. I am proud and grateful to be her daughter.

@tehyahenry

Normally, when someone is about to have a birthday they may spend a week or more planning their big day. I decided to do things differently the year of my sixteenth birthday. Instead of giving out invitations for my ‘sweet sixteen’, I chose to look for a job and just so happened to land an interview at two different restaurants. The first job had to send me away once they realized that I was underaged. I was pretty devastated but that didn’t stop me from showing up to my next interview with my head held high. After attending my second interview, the manager told me to come back after my birthday, and I landed the job shortly after. Setbacks like this made me realize from a young age that not everything will be handed to me so easily. Although, whenever I was passionate about getting something, it was never easy to shake off the anxious feelings that swelled up in me from anticipation. I always wanted to get things done quickly, but I have since learned that Paullina Simons was right when she said, “All good things come to those who wait.” So, whenever I truly want something I work for it by managing my time and resources efficiently. That’s why I need to manage my finances well as a student because I truly want to live smart, comfortably, and successfully. For me, financial literacy skills come in handy when dealing with financial aid for school, pay statements for work, and personal budgeting. In regards to financial aid, soon after I got accepted into my university, I made a budgeting plan and savings account; with this, I can easily keep track of how much money I need and already have available. So far, I have been able to make three different payments to my school because of this effective budgeting method. I also printed out a list of my remaining expenses for the 2023-2024 school year after the loans, grants, and personal money that I have earned have been applied. In addition, I schedule appointments with my financial aid advisor to stay on track with any documents or payments that require my attention. A way that I can effortlessly track my pay statements is through an app called, “ADP Mobile”. This app allows me to check how much I will be getting paid based on the number of hours I worked. It is extremely helpful because I can compare past statements to see if my pay declined, increased, or stayed the same. Another feature shows how much I made before taxes were taken out, and which taxes were applied. This app is great for anyone who is employed or needs guidance in budgeting! Personal budgeting looks like shopping at thrift stores and going straight to the clearance sections when at full-price stores. For instance, a few months ago I had to shop online for suitcases and suction bags because the school I am attending is out-of-state. During the browsing process, I made sure to compare prices, and look at the descriptions of the product, and customer reviews. This technique always helps me get better quality products while simultaneously saving money. Some other miscellaneous expenses I have been able to save money on due to this technique include a plane ticket, a first aid kit, and a laptop. Although, a few years ago supporting myself as a student was the last thing on my mind; I’m glad that I adapted these important skills so that I can support myself and manage my money properly as a successful college student.

When someone asks you, “what is my most noticeable feature?” You’ve probably given a standard response, such as “your eyes” or “your smile”, but I think that the most noticeable feature is someone’s skin. Our skin shapes us into who we are; it protects us, represents us, and speaks for us. Or so I thought. After you find out that you have a chronic autoimmune skin disease, you begin to question if your skin was truly designed to protect you. I know this because once my doctor had informed my mother and I of my diagnosis, I no longer felt safe within my own skin. All I could think was, “my life is never going to be the same and I am trapped with this forever.” It may have seemed like I was being a bit dramatic but I think that anyone would be devastated after hearing something so life-altering. The initial shock of my diagnosis passed after I had took my mother’s words of advice into consideration. She told me that these kinds of things are something that I’m just going to have to learn to live with, because it will always be there whether I like it or not. After that, she told me that it could be a lot worse and of course she was right. The doctor had informed us that my disease was at the least aggressive level, which means I’m lucky enough to continue living my life with some normalcy. Having an autoimmune disease shaped me into an optimistic thinker. I realized that if I can overcome the weight of a chronic disease then I can push through anything. This is why I don’t allow myself to overthink and dwell about tiring situations, people, and things that are out of my control. Instead, I focus on giving my absolute all into everyday and becoming the best version of myself. I do this by waking up everyday with positive thoughts, willing myself to go to work and make enough money to afford the college of my dreams. I also make sure to spend time with my family and pets. Sometimes I buy them gifts to show my love and appreciate, especially for my mother who has always stuck by my side in every battle. Lastly, one of the most important things I do is take time for myself. I make sure to frequently give myself time to relax and enjoy solitude; whether it’s by exercising, reading, or doing my daily skin routine, I always make sure to prioritize self-care. One of my favorite quotes from a motivation app that I use says, “Don’t be afraid to start over Tehya. This time you’re not starting from scratch. You’re starting from experience.” That’s how I see life with an autoimmune disease. I’m not trapped with this forever because it isn’t holding me hostage. Yes, it’s something that I have to live with forever, but that doesn’t mean that I should let it control me. I’m the one who decides how my life is going to be. Miserable or full of happiness? I choose the latter.

My name is Tehya Henry and I am 17 years old. I turn 18 in a few months, which is honestly something I would have never dreamed of becoming a reality. The younger version of myself truly believed that my story would have rolled the credits by now, but little does she know that every story comes with plot twists. As soon as I began middle school, mental illness took a huge toll on me. A major stressor was my father, I’ve never had a good relationship with him because he is extremely manipulative and narcissistic. At the time he was stirring up issues with my mother and I felt a great amount of distress and anger because it seemed that he would never let my family be happy. Even to this day, he will show up randomly at our house or text my mom an odd message about ‘getting the family together’. I didn’t realize until several years later that he was the reason I acted out. Not only that, but the environment I was placed in wasn’t the best. For those 3 years I was surrounded by nothing but toxic people and it’s really hard to adapt into living a healthy lifestyle when you have been living the complete opposite for a long time. All I ever knew was what people put into my head. I never felt like myself. I didn’t even know who I was supposed to feel like. It was like I was living three different lives. I had to wear a different mask for my father’s side of the family, my mom’s, and one at school. There was never a mask for myself, it was just blurry image and a gaping hole where my heart should’ve been. It’s clear that this overwhelming feeling is what led to my continuous loop of self-destruction all through middle and high school. My father’s side of the family are serious Jehovah Witness and have been trying to push their ideals onto my brother, Aron and I for as long as I can remember. While my mom’s side of the family is a mix of Christian and Catholic. Aron and I used to have to attend Christian Bible studies and children’s church all time. It was kind of traumatizing to have to go through that at such young age. It was a religious tug-of-war. Then of course, there was school. I was notorious for being the bad kid, the loud mouth. I would push anyone I could around and always tried to be the funniest kid in the room. This ultimately led to me getting put in the “Big Brother, Big Sister” Program because I obviously had some issues. Although, in 8th grade I finally decided to try the whole good kid thing and started to be a little nicer to my peers and myself. Mental illness does run in my family. My mom has bipolar disorder and this illness makes it difficult for her to do a lot of things normally, especially as a single parent. She works really hard and has always supported me but due to our financial problems, she is unable to afford a therapist. I was lucky enough to get me one when I needed it, yet she still suffers. I am forever grateful for her support and sacrifices because without her I wouldn’t be here. I wouldn’t be turning 18 in a few months, continuing my story. I am now able to tell the younger version of my self that the plot twist to our story is that we get a happy ending.

The unexpected and sudden death of my close friend, who was only 15 at the time, has completely altered my life. My friend, Ella, was the type of person who loved to dream big and spread joy all around. I met Ella when we were freshmen in high school and had only known her for a few months but had grown to love her as if we were childhood friends. Ella passed away in her sleep on March 19, 2020, due to Sudden Cardiac Arrest with no signs or warning. So far, she has been the only friend who understood, cared for, and loved me genuinely. To have her ripped away from my life without warning filled me without so much despair; I found myself being scared to fall asleep and paranoid that another loved one would soon follow her. Over the past year, I have managed to overcome these obstacles, although the paranoia still makes a haunting appearance from time to time. With professional help and support from my mother, I have built a new life and mindset for myself because I no longer want to focus on the weight of grief, I want to spend the rest of my life honoring Ella. I strive to live life the way that she never got the opportunity too. I'm fighting to live a life full of courage, passion, and happiness. The tragic event of her death occurred when the world became restricted due to COVID-19. At this time, many people began to lose hope in life and in themselves; they were too overwhelmed by the sudden life altering changes. This is only a small correlation to what grief feels like. Everyone's experience with grief is different and, in my case, this loss has helped me see the world and the people in it from a new perspective. I often think about the ways I can make a positive impact in our broken society. I ask myself; how can I bring light into this world without someone like Ella by my side? The only answer I can think of is to have courage. Courage is needed to choose uncertain paths in life, otherwise no change will ever come. I have courage by starting every day with a positive mindset, setting and accomplishing goals that others deem risky, and continuing to live life with overwhelming grief. Until this year, 2022, I was unable to see my purpose in life. Every day was a constant battle and left me devastated, both mentally and physically. With this lifestyle, a passion seemed far-fetched; but how could I have truly believed that when my friend had suffered through similar battles and still acquired big dreams of her own? Deep in my heart, I must've known that my life has a purpose, because if it hadn't then I wouldn't have taken the time to heal and find my passion. Ironically, finding my passion is what saved my life. It has given me something to focus on and allows me to think of how I want to contribute to society. In relation to society, what matters most to me is building a world where everyone can live without the fear of being discriminated or losing their life because of their race, sexuality, etc. As for my overall passion, I want to help others find and express themselves through fashion. With these aspirations, I plan to spread joy all around and make life easier for others just like Ella did. "Staying positive doesn't mean you have to be happy all the time. It means that even on hard days you know that better ones are coming." - Anonymous. This is one of my favorite quotes because it's a comforting reminder that it is perfectly reasonable to feel negative emotions, but that you also shouldn't let them stir you in the direction of a hopeless mindset. It can be extremely easy to let the overwhelming feelings of grief cloud your heart and mind. During the first year of Ella's passing, my three most consistent emotions were: confusion, despair, and hopelessness. I never would have thought that pure happiness would be a feeling that I would experience in this lifetime. So why now? Why is it that I am finally able to experience these positive emotions when I carry the weight of a tragic loss? It almost feels wrong. It isn't wrong though, it's a positive sign that I'm on the right path; the path that I need to have courage to stay on so that I can rightfully honor Ella. I want to thank Ella for being my friend and showing me kindness while she was alive, this is what keeps me fighting. I will live for the both of us. I will live with courage, passion, and happiness.