I was all alone with nothing but fresh grass and towering oak trees surrounding me, or at least that's what six-year-old me thought. Even though I was just in my backyard, seated about 10 feet away from my back door into my home, I grasped onto the lonely silence; a lonely silence that was then shattered by the sounds of chirping. Swarms of chirps, squawks, and chatters filled my ears and I eventually was able to see the sources of these noises. A whole group of birds, all different kinds, appeared out of nowhere and started fluttering around the trees of my backyard. Cardinals, eastern bluebirds, golden finches, red-bellied woodpeckers, and yellow-rumped warblers flapped in unison across the canopy above me. That day their passionate chirps turned me into a passionate bird enthusiast. Most girls my age growing up consistently watched Barbie, My Little Pony, or Strawberry Shortcake; while I did indeed watch and enjoy those iconic shows, my go-to television programs were always bird documentaries. I adored any National Geographic and David Attenborough films based around birds and had many bird-stuffed animals and coloring books filling my room. Six-year-old me's dream career? To be an ornithologist. While now, that is not the career path I will be pursuing, I am still a huge advocate for birds. Not only do I still have all of my bird stuffed animals, but I now own a baby cockatiel who has become the center of my world and heart. So what is it about these feathered beings? Is it their colors, their behaviors, their history, or their unique calls? All of these features draw me towards birds, but that is not my reasoning for my passion. For me, birds symbolize everything I want to be. Birds don't worry about tomorrow, they trust that their needs will be met and keep fluttering along. Birds don't question their appearances, they accept their beauty and flourish in their beautiful feathers. Birds can sing and swoon their peers with their voices. Birds can travel to any destination they desire whenever they wish. Overall, birds are free. Birds symbolize being free of worry, and being free of doubt. How I wish I could be a bird and live in a world without worry, doubt, and fear. I want to live in a world above grime and in a place of light and space to breathe. My passion for birds stems from a passion for free internal peace. Six-year-old me lived in a world above clouds, but as I've aged my heart has slowly sunken towards the ground. My passion for birds though can lift my heavy heart and let it soar. Their passion for life and freedom grants me peace. Luckily for me, birds are everywhere. Wherever I am I always happen to run into a little friend, whether on a walk in the park or even in a Walmart parking lot, my passion follows me wherever I go. I will say though, my cockatiel friend who lives with me can be a nuisance sometimes. Even still, her tantrum squawks and scattered poop still remind me of the eternal love and passion I have for Earth's feathered and free flyers.

The smell of popcorn filled the air as sounds of laughter and instrumental movie tunes played in the distance. I was an innocent five-year-old girl at Disney’s Epcot, about to head on to “Journey into Your Imagination”, a ride that takes a childlike view of the mind and imagination. As I was about to head into the line with my mother and grandmother, my grandmother got a phone call. The two of them end up going over to a bench to sit down as they look on with worry and fear, speaking anxiously on the phone. I stayed near them, but stared longfully at the ride next to me, wondering how the ride knew about what went on in my brain. As the two of them finished on the phone, they sat me down and told me that my Uncle Bill had just been diagnosed with brain cancer. “Cancer? Is he sick? Just give him some medicine and he’ll feel better”, is what I thought to myself as I mindlessly led my worried mother and grandmother to the ride of the mind. Sadly, little did I know, this would be the start of a tormenting, worrisome, five years that ended bittersweet. Starting from the age of five, I grew up with the norm of cancer; I had never been shocked by the diagnosis, I just learned over time what it was and that my uncle had it. As I grew older though, around the age of eight, my uncle’s tumor got worse. This is where the anxiety kicked in for me and my family. I’d catch my mom researching for hours on cures for cancer, and cancer prevention; she had told me in a moment of despair that “I’m going to find the cure for your uncle”. We ran raises dedicated to his name and illness all over the country to raise funds for cancer research, and to assist in paying for his medical bills. There was one time I remember he had to have open brain surgery, and my grandma recorded a video of me wishing him luck. Everyone was so tense and stressed; it scared me. There were nights I would wake up panting, gasping for breath, as I felt to touch my head, scared there would be tumors. Every time a headache would form, I’d burst crying, overthinking and assuming the worst that I “caught” what my uncle had. My last memory was of him walking down his hallway coming to say hi, crouched over with a walker. He gave us a weak “Hello”, and burst into tears. My brain was wrapped with confusion, fear, sadness, anger, and guilt. A few weeks later, we got the call that he passed in his sleep. My views on life and how I would live it would immediately change. I have always been an imaginative person; fully dependent on my mind and creativity. Now more than ever, I try my hardest every day to value my brain, thoughts, emotions, and imagination. The hardships my uncle went through when it came to his brain, I could never fathom. The impact his battle had on my family and our relationships were tremendously hard, so having to survive the battle inside his own body for that long of a period is a type of hardship I could never fathom. He had always been such a sweet, humble, and imaginative person through it all. I only hope to live a mindful future that my uncle would be proud of and to carry his perseverance and imagination in my life.

When we think of role models, we see figures such as George Washington, Walt Disney, or Adele. What if I was to say my role model grew her career from a children’s band that originated in the 90s, that sang songs about dinosaurs, hot potatoes, and big red cars? This band is known as The Wiggles. During the mid-2010s most of the older band members retired. Replacing them were three younger performers, one of them being Emma Watkins, playing the role of not only the Yellow Wiggle but the first female Wiggle. If you don’t know who the Wiggles are, this introduction may sound absurd; so I’ll move on and begin to discuss who Watkins is, her influence on me, and how I’ll be aiming to achieve her view on life after graduation. As of today, I’m fascinated with creative expression and early childhood development; I always connected with Emma Watkins as a child and now, because we both have a similar eye when it comes to our passions for visual art, the importance of childhood, and living a peaceful life of joy, hard work, and humility. Watkins grew up in Australia where she danced, and made home films, and stories. As she began her pursuit of education, she spent many years training in her desired fields; she now has a certificate specializing in musical theater, a Master’s degree in Media Arts and Production, and is now pursuing a Ph.D. in Australian sign language and dance. Her dedication to her education in addition to her creative passions marvels me. There’s a stigma that you should not pursue an artistic career field, and that you should not combine your passions with your education. I firmly disagree with this; being able to see the accomplishments Watkins has achieved gives me hopes and desires for my future and creative pursuits. For my future, I want to combine my artistic abilities with an education field in child care; at the same time, I refuse to stick with the same job for the rest of my life. Change and growth are vital for me to flourish, and Emma Watkins reflects on the importance of growth and change. Whilst touring with the Wiggles for an extended time, she ended up marrying one of her co-stars and personal friend. As the marriage continued though, the two of them mutually realized that they were only meant to be friends, and ended their marriage peacefully. A few years later, she left the Wiggles in pursuit of a new chapter. Watkins understands the importance of change and strives for peace and friendship, and she sees no point in holding grudges and boiling negative experiences out of proportion. Pursuing the beauty in everyone and everything, from a small ant to a giant fierce dinosaur, Watkins is who I look to when it comes to handling how I see change, the world, and my treatment of people. Now here I am; facing life with an unknown future. One of the things I know for my path is that if I see the world as Emma Watkins, through an ambitious, hardworking, yet childlike and kind wonder, I will find flourishing points in my life whilst also being able to overcome doubts. While I have humorous influences from Watkins, such as my favorite color is yellow because of her role as the Yellow Wiggle, there’s also a vast list of inspiring, encouraging, and humbling impacts Watkins has made on my life. A part of her has helped make me who I am, and how I’ll choose to live and see in the future.

Picture this; a summer camp, crowded with children. One in particular was disruptive and a disturbance to others around him; a true nightmare for a small group of teenage leaders. So how did I calm the storm? A sunray in the form of paints, wipes, paper, and engaging questions. During this summer camp, I was in charge of a small group of young teenage leaders, including the kids we were watching. One boy was picking fights with other kids, and making crude remarks in loud bursts of yells and screams. Not only were we overwhelmed by the singular 4th grader (let’s call him Levi), but so were the other children. As I was thinking of solutions to calm him down, I noticed that Levi had brought a sketchbook with him and immediately thought of an idea. I instructed my fellow leaders to proceed with the children, and I called Levi over to sit with me. Levi originally did not want to listen, but then I began to ask him about his sketchbook. Eventually, he came down and opened up his sketchbook; not only did he open his book, but he began to open up to me. I brought some paints and wipes and we began to create art in his book, whilst he talked to me calmly and respectfully. In summary, I was able to ask him questions about his interests, and more and more he talked on his own; as we were finishing, he told me about something going on in his home life that made him feel hurt. It all clicked in my mind; hearing Levi open up to me made me realize that this child was not just a “nuisance” kid. He was a child with feelings and a life outside of his troubling behavior. Creating a session and a moment of personal time solved our camp’s problem. Creating multiple creations and a safe space helped solve a small part of Levi’s problems. Creating an understatement between us helped me in learning how to solve similar problems in the future with myself, and with children. Creativity, whether in the form of art, music, writing, etc. is one of the most efficient ways of handling and expressing emotions. Expression with creativity can be an easy way for people to cry out for help, or simply help in organizing someone’s thought process. An overlooked, but potentially life-changing, problem solver would be for growth in Art Therapy careers. Therapists come in all different forms, but being an art therapist specifically would be the process of having a therapy session, whilst using art equipment during the sessions to allow efficient expression and trust. Proper training in pursuing this problem-solving field would include getting a Master’s degree, being a naturally patient and understanding person, and having experience and passion for all subjects related to the field; including a desire to help people, childhood development, problem-solving, and (most of all) creativity. Being granted the education and finances required, I would be able to assist in solving other children’s problems by pursuing an education in Art Therapy. Children are hungry for love. They are hungry for respect. Understanding. Assurance. Patience. Creativity. If my small understatement of a child’s mind and relationship with creativity could assist in solving a problem, given the resources and finances my small understanding could grow wider to reach a few more developing, problem-facing minds, to eventually a handful, and beyond.

My earliest and most vivid memories come from the ocean, and there's one distinct time I remember of me and my family leaving the beach. Just like any kid at the beach, I did not want to leave; and of course, me being a kid, I would react negatively when I didn't get my way. Every time I would complain about anything, my mom would always tell me that I need to list things I was joyful for. Normally I would never listen, but on that day, I thought about how much fun I had at the beach. I was still upset that I was leaving of course, but I chose to focus on what I had experienced rather than the fact I was leaving those experiences. We always hear the word "joy", but what is it? You may say it's a more eloquent term for happiness. But joy is not happiness; it's more complex than just a feeling. Our minds can't create joy for our hearts just like any other emotion, because joy isn't an emotion at all. Joy is a mindset, a perspective. Joy is a decision; a point of view. Joy is a choice; having joy is your choice. You are not in control of what occurs around you in your life, what you are in control of, however, is choosing to be joyful about those very occurrences. Having joy is one of my most important values for myself; it’s rewarding, hard to achieve, and has built my character. Having this characteristic has helped me in my life when times of disappointment have greeted me; I cry for a while, and then I begin to focus on all the years I have ahead of myself and all the life and experiences I’ve already been blessed enough to endure. Another thing that falls into that is even though a situation might be a disappointment for me, it may benefit another person who may have endured disappointments before then. Good and hope can come out of any situation, and deciding to have joy has allowed me to see and believe that. I know that joy will allow me to face further disappointments that will come in the future, but joy will always allow me to be the happiest to my fullest extent when given a moment of excitement and opportunities. Throughout my entire life, and now more than ever in my teen/high school years, this is a lesson that I had to learn over and over again many times and a mindset that I have worked very hard towards achieving. I value being joyful and being the best and brightest version of myself when I’m around others. I’m not afraid to discuss my disappointment or sadness towards something, but what I am against for myself is talking down on a situation and letting negativity and hopelessness overtake my mind. Sadness, disappointment, etc. is inevitable, and I believe it’s healthy to have these emotions and thoughts; we’re only human, and having these emotions regularly is important for growth. It’s when we wallow and complain without giving joy or hope a second chance, that what I believe to be unhealthy and something that everyone could deem beneficial if we constantly work and grow from it, allowing us to turn away from negativity and grow our values.

Birds. They're weird. I should know, because I live with one. Sure he doesn't pay rent, he poops on everything I own, and will try to chew my eyelashes out, but once you get used to having a bird, it's pretty fun! They're still weird though. One weird bird is a crow. They're noisy, annoying, and incredibly smart. Sometimes though, I think they're hiding something behind those beady eyes. A group of crows is called a "Murder". A murder? Are you kidding me? Surely there's a reason behind that. Now, I'm just messing around, I know that birds are just… birds. Intelligent, noisy, and feathery. Did I mention they're weird? Their weirdness is something I've always been fond of though, even as a young girl. Eight year old me was absolutely hyper fixated on birds, and I begged my parents to let me own one. Luckily they knew how much work it took to own a bird, and didn't let me own one until high school. Now I own a cockatiel named Macaroni; and he has the most dead blank stare I've ever seen. I'll be laying on my bed, and then this bird just crawls up onto my chest, settles, and stares at me with his blank beady eye. No matter if I'm tired, happy, or sad he'll constantly do it. Only just a few weeks ago, I was incredibly sad. I had many things weighing me down and felt like I was being stabbed in the heart. While having my time to mope and dwell in the depths of despair, here comes my feather ball pattering his way towards me, then laying on my chest, and staring at me. I could have at least had some personal space. Once I got over my sadness, I thought about that moment and how funny it was. I started sketching pictures of birds with silly, dead faced stares. I was looking at different types of birds to draw, when I came across a crow. I remembered too that a group of crows was called a murder, and that just made the crow funnier to me. I started drawing clusters of crows, with the same dead stare my bird Macaroni always loves giving me. After finishing my painting, I realized that when I face hard times (whether I'm really sad or if I get stabbed by a crow) the simple, sweet, and overall weird things in my life can be an assistance towards positivity. Still, birds are just plain weird.

My whole life I have been creating art. All kids can say they've been drawing since they were a baby, but as kids approach their older years, that assurance in saying they still draw dwindles. Luckily for me, art has been my desired passion since I was a child. It wasn't until I turned eleven that I realized I wanted to push myself more with it. Art allows me to create a story that exists only within my head out into the visual world. I can create scenes with characters going through joy or sadness. Landscapes that can tell ancient stories from the time they were just developed. I can be messy and have fun without having to worry about seeming crazy! As I'm approaching college, my dream is to be able to have a career in some art field; except now that the time is drawing near, I've been getting discouraged. As much as I want to do some form of art for a living, I can't help but feel that it may be unrealistic and not worth the little money we have that can go towards my college career. Specifically more so than ever, I've been dreaming of pursuing a career in art that can allow people to connect with one another. Art therapy has been a career I've been turning my gaze towards, because it combines the three things I love. Art, expression, and most of all people. I want my art and creating to be a safe space for people, adults and children alike. The two pieces of recent art that are important to me are my watercolor pieces "Just Mary" and "Pioneers". For my Mary piece, it is a simple portrait of Mary holding her son Jesus from the Bible; I wanted simplicity to be the focus of the painting. Typically, paintings of Mary the Virgin are extravagant and holy, but the Bible and records state that Mary was just a young girl at the time. Knowing that a young girl like me was able to do such a courageous thing is what inspired me to paint my piece. My final piece, "Pioneers", is different from what I usually create. Typically I paint character illustrations, reminiscent of concept art or children's books. "Pioneers" is different because it's a large landscape where the characters aren't the focus, rather the field is. This painting allowed me to let go of any fears I had of making mistakes, and to allow my brain to trust my hand and just paint whimsical, circular strokes. I labeled it pioneers, because in this big world with an even bigger future ahead of us, we are just like pioneers building our future with each step we take. If I am awarded this scholarship, I will use it to push myself to work towards a career that can connect people and art together, as art has always done for many years.

"Stay Gold, Ponyboy," What does "Stay Gold" mean, and what type of name is Ponyboy? The Outsiders is a novel written by Author S.E. Hinton, which follows the story of a young teenager named Ponyboy, and his life as a gang member. At first, I was intimidated to read this book; the last thing I wanted to read about was a gang. To my surprise, it wasn't what I thought it would be; rather than a story about fighting, it tells a tale of loss, hope, grief, and moving forward. The novel begins with Pony, and his friends, as they live the life of a "greaser", and their rivalry against the rich gang known as "Socs". The youngest of the greasers are Pony and Johnny, and one night the two get surrounded by a few Socs. One takes hold of Pony and attempts to drown him. Out of panic, Johnny grabs a knife and kills the Soc. The two boys are now on the run and The Outsiders truly begins its tale. This book is written for troubled people, meaning that the story can apply to any one. We may not be a part of a gang, but our troubles no matter how extreme or small can apply to the turmoil these characters experience. People can lose friends, family, and their own soul due to grief and anger in an instant. The story is an eye opener, and does not take light of the true experiences grief and hate can do to a person, and how one's anger can affect many others. One small action of hate can lead to the loss of lives. This can apply to our modern world; with the anger and fear we have access to, it's easy to intertwine fear with our own troubles and sink away into the depths of hate. But, there's a hope that we can grab a hold of. "Stay Gold." When we begin sinking into the darkness, we can work to look towards the light. While one cannot remain innocent and youthful forever, we can hold onto the youthfulness and strength inside our hearts. This is why people should read The Outsiders; a story of loss, grief, the realities of life, and moving forward. It is a tale that we can all apply to our own lives, and an experience that I guarantee you will gain wisdom and peace from.

We all know the story of Christmas, about the virgin Mary who gives birth to the savior of the world; but, is that all there is to Mary? What should her story mean to us? When I was a young girl at church, I remember there being an oil painting print of Mary in the halls of the building. This painting always stuck with me, because she looked different to how I had normally seen her portrayed. Typically, you see her as peaceful, holy, and older; but in this piece she was just a girl. A young girl, who had messy hair, a dirt speckled face, and a tired yet courageous look. It left me breathless every time I saw it. Now that I'm older, Mary's story astonishes me more and more. My dream is to work with children, and overall to be a strong and hardworking mother. Even though I'm young, the thought of carrying a child and helping them grow into a person who'll influence so many people, and maybe even the world, is such an insane realization. Mothers hold so much power in their hands; and just like Mary, not only did she carry a son, but she was in charge of caring for the savior of the world. To this day, all the people I look up to and aspire to be like are the mothers in my life; especially my own mother and grandmother. Just like Mary, both my mother and grandmother went through their own hardships growing up. While their story is not mine to tell, I have just as strong of an admiration for them as I do Mary. As Christmas approached last year, I wanted to create an elaborate piece to portray my feelings towards motherhood and Mary's story. I spent all December planning out sketches, and practicing poses for references. I planned out to use a huge canvas and attempt a clean and precise acrylic painting. As I tried to put it together, I was never able to bring myself to do it. I was burnt out, and faced a block in the road. After taking a break for a while, on Christmas eve night I grabbed a small piece of cold pressed watercolor paper, and grabbed my old watercolor palette gifted to me by my grandma. I started just sketching, and eventually once midnight hit and it was officially Christmas day I had finished my painting. No, it isn't anything large or detailed. It's small, and simple. Yet, there's still a strong love to it; exactly how a mother's love works. A mother's love is comfortable and familiar, simple yet strong. That's what this piece, and Mary's story, means to me. A simple yet strong kind of love.

How can we help children who feel lost, angry, and alone? Throughout my whole life, I've always felt a connection and special love for children. Even as young as five years old, I'd rather have played with a baby than other girls my age. Now as a senior in highschool, I hope to pursue a career in childcare; specifically working as a therapist or health care worker for children. Throughout middle school and highschool, all my volunteering opportunities have been helping kids. From volunteering as an art teacher, to being a small group leader; all the way to being a lego teacher, to assisting as a director for an elementary play. Now that I'm older and have had more experience volunteering and working with children, I've encountered countless of kids that endure so much internal pain. In a whole group of good kids, there's always that one deemed as a bad apple; but is that a fair title to give a child? These "bad kids" use anger to express their heartache, and I've had many times where I've sat down with a child one on one to talk with them and show them love. Growing up, and currently, my family was never rich nor had a lot of money. Over time my neighborhood has gotten more and more dangerous, and I've grown up comparing my life to the life my friends live. Safe and happy homes where everyone knows one another, not having to worry about going outside, being able to do the out of school activities you want to be a part of without having to worry about money. My mom homeschools me and my siblings, and my dad works as a teacher. Luckily, I'm thankful to say that my parents have always been considerate of my mental health, and are patient with me during hard times; especially when it comes to money worries I have for now and my future. I could have been one of those "troubled kids" because of my fears, but thanks to the love of my family and peers in my life, I've been able to focus on love rather than fear. Sadly, some children are not as fortunate to be guided as I was; so I want to be that person who can be a safe space and guide them through hard times. It's not just love that children need from those responsible for them; but patience, wisdom, and hope. I know that these key values can take away any anger or fear a child has; and these values need to be given to children in need before it is too late and a child becomes a shell of someone they once were. That is why I want to help our future generation. Being straight and upfront, I am not financially set for college. I know I deserve this award, because of my journey with children, my own journey growing up, and the hard work I've kept up to achieve a high GPA. For all that my parents have done for me, I want to be able to give them the peace that I am financially set for my future. If I were to be awarded with this money it would not only help my family and I financially, but potentially future children I may assist.