During my teenage years, I went through the hardest lessons that I could ever hope to learn. Complete feelings of inadequacy and unworthiness were merely a baseline for a foundation for something I already knew was broken grappling with its repercussions even to this day. When I was younger, my family went through a horrible divorce, and that honestly still traumatizes me to this day. Teenage angst, already a formidable force on its own, only served to compound the pain. So it was not a blessed time. Surrounded by individuals I mistook for friends, I found myself treated as nothing more than an inconvenience, while those who truly cherished and respected me were relegated to the sidelines. Adding to the turmoil was the suffocating presence of a helicopter mom who had an overbearing nature. Which was the cause of no boundaries so I was literally at the mercy of others. It was a cycle of emotional manipulation and abandonment that left me adrift, questioning my worth and my place in the world. For the longest time, I was a plaything that people could put down until I was useful, or new to them somehow. It wasn't until COVID-19 happened that I was able to do so much introspective work into the why. Why I was like this? Why I couldn't say no? How could I just listen to my peers? The tumultuous year of 2020 saw me confronting these questions head-on, grappling with a sense of identity crisis, and grappling with the loss of those who no longer served my growth. I wish I had this album in high school. I could have related to a lot of the "Guts" album, but there is one song in particular that I will love with my entire being for the rest of my life. That song is "the grudge" from its lyrics to its heartbreaking meaning of betrayal and loss. This encapsulates my time as a teenager. Listening to "The trust that you betrayed the confusion that still lingers" for the first time was cathartic. It was like the pain that I had worked through for the longest time finally had an outlet. These few and simple words encapsulate the essence of my teenage years, a period marked by shattered trust and lingering confusion. Yet, through now years of healing. I have realized that despite the losses endured, I have lost nothing of true value.

What is climate change? The UN refers to it as long-term shifts in temperatures and weather patterns. When people think of climate change they think of the bare minimum on a huge scale. They think of polar bears and ice glaciers melting, and it scares many people to actually change. And plus that's global warming is an effect of climate change but not climate change. So how do we commit to real change? I believe that agriculture and lessening our carbon footprint is the perfect way we bring people and knowledge back to the effects of climate change. First things first it is necessary to have people be more knowledgeable about the destruction of climate change and what may come with it. But how do we do that? Talking to Native indigenous people of the land will help more than giving info packets to people who do not want to listen. For example, one of the reasons large lands like California and parts of Australia have seen extreme wildfires in recent years is that the land has not been burned. Stay with me because I understand that it sounds counter-intuitive, but burning these lands promotes new plant growth. While also preventing wildfires. Next have an active plan to end environmental racism. For the short period that I lived in Irvington, NJ. I have seen first-hand grocery stores without vegetables and fruits, and if they're any then imagine the rotten food you've seen. To the point that you have to drive 15-60 mins for actual healthy food that is cookable. Though food and grocery are just instants of environmental racism it is a perfect way to begin. Some of the solutions that I would like, to begin with, are greenhouses that sell fresh produce I've been lucky enough to visit and see in NYC. One, you don't have to waste gas going 15-60 mins by car to a "local" grocery store. Second, it will benefit the community as a local business that provides a necessary need. Third, greenhouses allow for stronger and faster plants to be grown. Finally, better public transportation will actually benefit society. Many will say that public transportation is necessary for fighting climate change, and it is. But I have been an avid commuter from NJ to NY many times and the one thing I can say about the buses and the trains is that there has to be a better way. For example, I will talk about NJ Transit, there are many complaints about it having poor management, being unsafe, and being unreliable. Why should we place ourselves, family members, and our children in dangerous situations to benefit others' safety? This is why we must provide comfort and safety as not just an option but a standard. And I can guarantee that there will be an increase. It starts with giving buses important road privileges and more buses. Buses and trains and their stations must be cleaner, especially since Covid-19. The Biden administration would like to pass an infrastructure plan with lots of projects including a multibillion-dollar tunnel. So if we could fight to fund buses and trains, it would be inclusive and would diversify many of the people riding on public transportation. I would like to end with a quote "Insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results" It is time to get different results.

For me, I used to see the term "self-care" in a negative light. I saw it as procrastination because "Why would you want work later when you can finish it now?". Yet simultaneously, I was driving myself insane trying to get everything done. It wasn't until I could afford to take a break I saw that I was not only hurting myself but my work. Because as soon as I finished I didn't want to do things like proofread since I was burnt out with the projects as a whole. Immediately upon, spreading out my work I saw my mental health and grades excel. I could focus on activities like skincare and technology, hobbies that I'm not only interested in but make me happy. Believe me, it was and is hard to implement these practices for the reason that you're just going to want to do. So here are some tips that help me practice good self-care. Put your on-timer when you need a break sometimes you can dissociate in your work give yourself that need a 5, 10, or even 15 min break. Eat healthily. Don't force yourself to do anything that you don't want to do, and if you must do it take breaks in between. Finally, measure your progress with self-care. Nevertheless at the end of the day self-care can mean a lot of things. But you have to figure out what it means to you and your boundaries of what you are will do. What do you enjoy? What hobbies keep you interested? What is your time frame for self-care?

ART FORM: Digital collages Though many would have you believe poetry is a dying art form, it is merely evolving for the times. But poetry in its true and natural state is a beautiful way to capsulize time, struggle, and pain. Especially when dealing with African Americans and their history. Poetry has been passed down in lyrics and rhythm of music for generations now, and that’s not changing anytime soon. Yet some believe that songs are not as poetic as their purebred counterpart, and that’s just not true. Both speak on relationships, from relationships about a woman to a relationship with one’s self. Both can be interpreted in different contexts and showing that they are not linear in the meaning of depth. Even though these artists live in different time periods, and have very different experiences. Somehow they were walking in the same paths while writing these works. Throughout these poems and songs, the symbolism and word choice lead to a larger outcome. Childish Gambino’s "Redbone" is just as poetic as “The Negro Speaks of Rivers” by Langston Hughes and I wanted to convey that through my art. The first bit is Childish Gambino's Redbone. While the second photo reimagines “The Negro Speaks of Rivers” by Langston Hughes.

Oluwakemi Akanle In the first year of college, I did not think that teachers or staff would get my name right, so I put a nickname along with an abbreviation. The Kemi (Kimmy) title is what I typed on my college applications letters, and guess what I got in. I just assumed that no one would know or care and because I didn’t. I would never even allow them the chance to disappoint me, so I did it to myself. I lessen my culture and my history into a four-letter word that should be nine. I put the strength of my ancestors on the back burner and began to make apologies for something that I thought I did. When there are names like Cassandra (nine letters), Alphonsine (ten letters), or even Cornelius (nine letters). The first thing that comes to mind when I see these names is that they are not long or confusing, their were so regal and elegant. So then I thought to myself, why do I think like this? Well, that question unlocked hidden memories. Immediate flashbacks of elementary school not being able to bring my traditional African dishes because I had to be “considerate” of my other classmates, and their westernized pallets. Remembering that my mom forbade us to ever consider it as an option for food if we were ever in school. Being a first-generation student is not a luxury, it’s an expectation. Our parents fought to get us to this point to be the engineers, the lawyers, and the doctors that they always wanted us to be. But with that come erasure and camouflage of our culture, language, and even our foods. We have to toe the line between being ourselves, our culture, or a westernized version of us. And because of that, they will ask why we care so much about what people think? They will say we should be celebrating these differences. Until it becomes a Halloween costume. Or a fashion trend that we were mocked for in class, but know it's cool because everyone's doing it now. But what these people don't realize is that fitting in is better than the death sentence of sticking out. We were children so we conformed to the ideal not knowing if we were right or wrong, how this would affect us in the future, or what it would cost in the end. For the United States of America to call themselves Melted Pot when nothing has melted. We're just standing still involved insulting people's differences. It's scary because it seems like we're being used to fit a hidden agenda. But I want to be better. So, hello my name is Oluwakemi, and my name is regal, and in the epitome of elegance.