History has always been my favorite subject. I find getting to peek into the lives of people who lived years, decades, or millennia ago yet have such a profound impact on our present fascinating. There is much to be learned from each event in the world and national history. This love of history combined with my heart for youth is my main reason for working toward earning my Secondary Education degree with an emphasis on History. As difficult as teenagers can be, they are my favorite age group to work with. They are stuck between adulthood and childhood, trying to navigate their way through the world. With so many negative influences on them coming from social media and pop culture, teachers are sometimes one of the few cheerful lights in a teen’s life. As a current cafeteria lady, I see firsthand just how much some of them need an adult they can count on. I know I am having a positive influence on my “kiddos” now and am excited to continue in that capacity while completing my degree. However, I feel I can not only be there for them as an emotional support and cheerleader but also as one who shares my love of history with them as a teacher. My goal is to teach at my alma mater, where I currently work as a cafeteria lady. My kids, grades 6, 2, and K4 attend as well. Faith Academy is a large private school that has had an even larger impact on my life. Some of the same teachers who poured into and prayed for me are now some of my closest friends and are pouring into and praying for my kids. They are all still cheering for me, even as a 32-year-old wife and mother who is returning to college to get her degree. I want to give back to future generations what has been given to me. Combining my love of history and my heart for the teenage group made deciding to become a high school history teacher easy. Being able to not only be someone who teaches their students history but also about life and doing it as a career seems dream-like. As someone who knows what it is like to have a teacher whose class you dread, my goal is to be the teacher with a class you know you can take a breath in. We will learn. After all, “Those who forget their history are condemned to repeat it.” (George Santayana). However, we will learn, love, grow, and laugh as well.

I vividly remember asking my dad who was rushing around the house as I had never seen “Geez, who got shot?”. Little did I know, my choice of words was more accurate than sarcastic. My PawPaw Bob had taken his own life 8 days after Christmas. This was the most significant loss I had faced up to this point. My parents and family were all trying to process the unexpected loss while also dealing with the reason behind my PawPaw Bob’s suicide (we found out he was embezzling from a company he was affiliated with) so much of my grieving was done alone. Having the flu on the day of his funeral did little to help me find closure and adequately grieve. It took years, and another suicide, for me to finally begin to learn to process and deal with my grief properly. A call from my mom is nothing new. We talk multiple times a day. However, when I called her back when I left the doctor on December 7, 2022, her words left me crying on a curb outside a Walgreens, unable to breathe, and in full panic attack mode. One of her best friends, a bonus mom for my brothers and me, was successful in her third suicide attempt. Shelly had been in pain for years from an accident. That pain did not stop her from coming in from Texas to help my husband and I buy our first house, her sending gifts and calling on special occasions, or just checking in. However, the pain became too much to bear on the December day, just days before Shelly’s birthday leaving her family and friends in pieces. My first experience with suicide was, what I considered, “easy”. I had no idea the trauma my unhealed emotions were causing until years later. With the help of my husband and close friends, I was able to process Shelly’s death while also healing from PawPaw Bob’s years ago. Having friends who prayed for me, and a husband who let me cry while he cooked, cleaned, and watched out for the kids was crucial to my mental healing. My faith was also a massive part of my being able to cope. Remembering “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted” (Psalms 34:18) and “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted” (Matthew 5:4) were verses I clung to during my worst days. Learning how to ignore the empty spots at the table during holidays and ignoring the pain of knowing how proud both PawPaw Bob and Shelly would be of my kids as they hit certain milestones and achieve their goals is still something I am working on. But through their losses, I learned the importance of properly grieving and allowing myself to process traumatic life events as well as being present for my kids as they go through their own processes of dealing with hardships. Hopefully, we will never have to experience another suicide, but if we do past experiences will help be able to go through the stages without causing future trauma.

History has always been my favorite subject. I find getting to peek into the lives of people who lived years, decades, or millennia ago yet have such a profound impact on our present fascinating. There is so much to be learned from each event in the world and national history. This love of history combined with my heart for youth is my main reason for working toward earning my Secondary Education degree with an emphasis on History. As difficult as teenagers can be, they are my favorite age group to work with. They are stuck between adulthood and childhood, trying to navigate their way through the world. With so many negative influences on them coming from social media and pop culture, teachers are, at times, one of the positive lights in a teen’s life. As a current cafeteria lady, I see firsthand just how much some of them need an adult they can count on. I know I am having a positive influence on my “kiddos” now and am excited to continue in that capacity while completing my degree. However, I feel I can not only be there for them not only as an emotional support and cheerleader but also as one who shares my love of history with them as a teacher. Being a working mom with 3 kids means weekends at the baseball fields, late nights with homework, and long days when kids fall ill with my husband and I splitting the days we take time off from work. The time factor is something my husband and I discussed when talking about my return to school. We realize there will be sacrifices made with our time, but my husband and children are excited to see and help me accomplish one of my life goals of becoming a high school teacher. Financial obstacles have kept me from beginning my college journey sooner. Knowing there were scholarships and grants helped my decision to begin now, but there will still be sacrifices we make as a family to be able to pay back the loans I do have to take out to finance the completion of my degree. All three of my children are involved in school extracurriculars. They know some extras may need to be cut to help save money until loans are paid back. Thankfully they are just as excited as I am to complete my Secondary Education degree and are willing to make sacrifices of their own. Overall, my challenges are not as extensive as others, but as a 32-year-old wife, mom, aunt, Sunday School teacher, nursery volunteer, full-time cafeteria lady, and part-time bookkeeper/secretary, re-starting college is daunting. Paying student loans after completing classes as well as making sure there are enough hours in the day are things I have concerns about, but I am confident I have the skills and motivation to see my degree through. The time and financial sacrifices my family and I make will be well worth it as becoming a high school history teacher is something I have wanted to do for 15 years and I am so excited to begin classes soon.

It has been nearly 13 years since I have been in a classroom. The most I remember from Math is the Pythagorean Theorem. History has been made since 2010. Even Science is changing. As a mom, I have been a teacher for the past 11 years. As excited as I am to complete my degree after over a decade break, I can’t help but be a little nervous about the challenges of stepping back into the role of student. However, I know with the encouragement of my friends and family, this new venture will be a success and I will finally earn my college degree in Secondary Education with an emphasis on History and become a high school history teacher. With 3 kids in private school, I am familiar with the financial concerns of returning to college full-time. Even with two full-time jobs and a part-time job supplying our family’s financial needs, there are times my husband and I are forced to find odd jobs to fill the gaps in our family budget. However, completing my college degree will help with our financial needs by helping with our kid's tuition with a teaching job at their private school, which also happens to be my alma mater. Being a working mom with 3 kids means weekends at the baseball fields, late nights with homework, and long days when kids fall ill with my husband and I splitting the days we take time off from work. The time factor is also something my husband and I discussed when talking about my return to school. We realize there will be sacrifices made but my husband and children are excited to see and help me accomplish one of my life goals of becoming a high school teacher. Overall my challenges are not as extensive as others, but as a 32-year-old wife, mom, aunt, Sunday School teacher, nursery volunteer, full-time cafeteria lady, and part-time bookkeeper/secretary, re-starting college is daunting. Paying student loans after completing classes as well as making sure there are enough hours in the day are things I have concerns about, but I am confident I have the skills and motivation to see my degree through. The time and financial sacrifices my family and I make will be well worth it as becoming a high school history teacher is something I have wanted to do for 15 years and I am so excited to begin classes soon.

"I'm telling you! Something else is going on. He's not 'just bad'." My husband and I had the same conversation countless times and yet he was still not entirely convinced discipline would not be able to "fix" our son. However I, as well as my parents and brothers, and friends from church could see my son was facing something none of the rest of us were facing. After two years and some parent conferences later, we would get the call from his doctor who formally diagnosed our son with ADHD. Another year later we learned he also struggles with dyslexia. Both of these diagnoses only compounded the mental struggles he has related to being molested by someone he trusted and loved as well as his adoption by my husband due to abandonment (in his mind) by his biological father. My son did really well in counseling for his sexual abuse and was told we no longer needed to come in on a regularly scheduled basis. We have been back when he is triggered and we are able to use tools we learned from his therapist to help de-escalate things when he gets worked up. My son is now also in dyslexia therapy through his school and is doing well making progress learning tools to help him manage school work both now and in the future. My husband and I have discussed my going back to college for a while. At first I felt I wanted to finish my teaching degree, but seeing my son deal with all of the trials in his life and the research I have done to help him has led me to pursuing my degree in psychology. To be able to better help him and anyone else facing what he is going through is my ultimate goal. Educating others on the stigma of ADHD and dyslexia is something I strive to do whether in a classroom setting or by setting up a non profit to help parents get the help they need for their child. Highlighting awareness on familial sexual abuse would also be included. Giving the survivors a voice and the tools to speak out and bring justice to their abusers while also giving them the confidence to take the first step to healing is a way to help them feel less alone in their journey. My son has a huge support system in our family, friends, and fellow church members, and that is definitely not something we take for granted. However we know there are many who do not have the support and maybe have even been kicked out of their home for speaking up about their abuse. While I am well researched in this area, having an official college education and degree, will provide the credentials needed to have my voice heard even louder as we speak out for victims and those living with learning delays, mental illness, and any other issue they may be facing in life. Having scholarship money, in any amount, would be a huge help to our family. Every bit of the money would be used toward tuition and any school fees I may have as I pursue my degree.