The main goal that I have in working in this field is to help kids like me. The kids that did not get their parent's attention, the gifted kids, the quiet ones, the kids that did not need to be checked on, or the oldest daughter. Growing up, I was the gifted kid, the child the parents never needed to check on. I was the child that my parents needed to check on. I had a tremendous mental battle in my head while my younger sister, who was only eleven, was undergoing treatment for Leukemia, or blood cancer. I never wanted to speak up because I did not need to be checked in on, I was always just fine. I put on a mask to everyone around me but inside of my head, I was extremely anxious, depressed, and suicidal. I was a 4.0 GPA student and even though I was mentally struggling more than any middle-schooler and high schooler should have experienced I kept my mask on and grades flawless. My life journey allows me to understand what it is like to be a gifted kid, there is an immense amount of pressure put on you by your parents, teachers, peers, and yourself. Often the only way that gifted kids get checked on is if they fail or do something out of the ordinary. In my future career, I want to be the person in these kids' lives who can empathize with them. I want to be a children and adolescent counselor. Saying I will do this is not enough, it is substantial to have an action plan. If I were to get a client that comes in that is a gifted kid, I would remind them that their emotions are valid and the pressure that they are putting on themselves is not healthy. I would work with them diligently on creating a game plan with them. I would guide them to find a creative expression of how they are feeling. Whether it is music, art, or journaling I would encourage them to find something to express their emotions. Then, I would encourage them to get connected to something socially. Maybe it is scouts, sports teams, clubs, bands, or anything to guarantee that they feel supported. Being a gifted kid can be beneficial in many ways, but everything comes with its challenges. Experiencing the same situation all my life myself will help me, help people. Again, my goal is to help kids like me and assist them in realizing their potential and what an astounding future is ahead of them.

May 16th, 2018. The day my life changed forever, the day when I would see my father cry for the first time in my life. That day was when my sister got diagnosed with Leukemia, which is a form of blood cancer. My depression and anxiety ran miles in my mind after my father told us about my sister's critical health. Instead of doing the things I love, I sit in my house and wait. Waiting for the results. I waited for my sister to be back to playing games with us. Waited for the anxiety to be lifted from our shoulders. I will wait for a time when I do not have to cry myself to sleep because no one lays in the bed adjacent to mine. Impossible to lay my head down at night. Every time my eyelids droop to cover my blue eyes, I am constantly picturing my sister with a bag of bright neon yellow liquid and some saline solution being pumped into her continuously and seeing her bald head lie on the red and yellow mickey mouse pillowcase with a feeding tube dangling down from the inside of her nose. Throughout my mental health throughout the whole journey in the pits, I was suicidal, depressed, anxious, and unmotivated. I could barely get out of bed, I had no friends, and I just wanted my sister to be okay. My sister was determined to be cancer free 858 days (about 2 and a half years) later. I had this thought in my mind that once my sister was okay, I would be okay. I still battled extreme anxiety and even some symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder. I went to therapy, and after my first appointment, I knew what my life was calling. I enjoy helping and hearing about people throughout their journeys. The healing of my trauma pointed me in the direction of being able to help people heal from their trauma. Without going through the trauma that I had experienced I would not be able to figure out what I wanted to do in life, I want to be guide for people throughout life so that they would be able to have the most joyous and fulfilling life they have possible. My goal is to be able to be a therapist to children, to be able to help and hear them. I hope that I can make a comfortable space for them to thrive. I hope to work in a school setting so that I can be able to help students be successful and achieve the dreams that they have like I am now able to achieve my goals.

If I were to be a highly influential figure, I would stand for more research on Childhood Cancer. I have personally been greatly affected by Childhood Cancer. It is something that you would not want to wish on anyone. It is very hard to go through your day, knowing that your child, siblings, family member, or friend are in the hospital, suffering. Childhood cancer is the leading cause of death by disease amongst Children. That should not be the case. We need more awareness of the topic and we need money donated for research. My younger sister had cancer and she was often in the hospital, we saw people come and go often and some people stay for just as long as we were there. We saw a lot of death from cancer around us. It was extremely depressing seeing these families mourn the loss of their child by a disease that "should only be for adults." People do not understand how easily cancer can strike a family, there needs to be more aware of all the hard it is and how strong the patients are for having to fight this awful disease. So basically, if I was a highly influential figure, I would fight for more research, more money, and more awareness of Childhood Cancer.

My favorite book is Just Mercy by Bryan Stevenson. Just Mercy is about a lawyer who advocates for his clients that have been cheated by the system. Just Mercy speaks on not only the journey through some legal cases but some life-changing stories. It shows the unfairness in the Justice system. Bryan Stevenson is a lawyer that fights for justice. He has a lot of cases that some would call “lost causes”. That does not matter to Bryan. One of the main cases that the book is focused on is the case of Walter McMillian. Walter has not even near the murder, he was at a fish fry at his house while the murder was taking place. But since Walter was an easy target because he was African American, they put him on death row. This book helped me view things through an entirely different lens. Knowing that everything that accorded in this book was in fact true is what really hit me hard. The Justice System that we currently operate in here in the United States of America is not only unjust but is an unequal system that puts people who don't deserve it because of their race, gender, or class. It taught me about the racism that is still present today and how badly people of color are treated in our Justice System and in our Jails. I really did love this book. The book shines a light on something that I will never understand to the fullest. Just Mercy teaches you that everybody deserves a second chance at life.

Although out my life I have always helped people. One of my favorite ways to help people is being there for them and listening. Sometimes in life, we someone to just listen to us and not interpret them while they are speaking. I love helping people problem-solve their problems and pointing them in the right direction with they need it. I, not only, want to make an impact in the lives of those closest to me but other people I interact with. Often, I babysit kids and I always make sure that there is a time while I am there that we sit down and talk. Whenever we do that I feel as if the child always talks the entire time and I just let them talk until they decide they are done. I want people to know that they are loved, they are heard, and that they matter. Being there and just listening is my favorite way to help people.