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Anastasija Grozdanovska

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Bio

Hello everyone! My name is Anastasija! -I am a 20-year-old 2-D digital & traditional artist, 3-D Source Filmmaker animator & artist of 6 years(-ish?), and a writer! -And I am majoring in Computer Science + Animation at DePaul University!

Education

DePaul University

Bachelor's degree program
2024 - 2026
  • Majors:
    • Design and Applied Arts
    • Computer Science
  • GPA:
    3.9

College of Lake County

Associate's degree program
2022 - 2023
  • GPA:
    3.9

Lake County High School Technology Campus

High School
2020 - 2022

Warren Township High School

High School
2018 - 2022
  • GPA:
    3.8

Miscellaneous

  • Desired degree level:

    Master's degree program

  • Graduate schools of interest:

  • Transfer schools of interest:

  • Majors of interest:

    • Design and Applied Arts
    • Computer Science
  • Not planning to go to medical school
  • Career

    • Dream career field:

      Computer Science

    • Dream career goals:

      Animation, Computer Science, and Business

    • Student Ambassador

      DePaul University
      2024 – Present10 months

    Sports

    Swimming

    Club
    2019 – 20201 year

    Tennis

    Intramural
    2012 – 20164 years

    Track & Field

    Junior Varsity
    2021 – 2021

    Swimming

    Junior Varsity
    2018 – 20213 years

    Research

    • History

      Warren Township High School — Student
      2022 – 2022

    Arts

    • Drawing
      Present
    • Multimedia Design/WTHS

      Computer Art
      2020 – 2022
    • Multimedia Design

      Videography
      2021 – 2021
    • Multimedia Design

      Graphic Art
      2021 – 2022
    • Multimedia Design

      Photography
      2021 – 2021
    • Woodland Middle School

      Ceramics
      2015 – 2018
    • Animation
      2016 – Present

    Public services

    • Volunteering

      National Honor Society/WTHS — Volunteer
      2022 – 2022
    • Volunteering

      Gurnee Park District — Volunteer
      2021 – 2021
    • Volunteering

      Tech Campus Tour of Tech — Student Ambassador
      2021 – 2021
    • Volunteering

      Hunt Club Community Center — Volunteer
      2021 – 2022
    • Volunteering

      Feed My Starving Children — Volunteer
      2019 – 2022

    Future Interests

    Volunteering

    Philanthropy

    Entrepreneurship

    Netflix and Scholarships!
    Out of some of the shows and movies I watched on Netflix, the Super Mario Bros Movie topped the cake! I remember watching the trailer on TV with my parents, and I was excitedly suggesting to both of my parents that we should watch the movie. However, we held off on watching the film for some time. That was until one day, I suggested to my roommate that we watch the Super Mario Movie, and we watched it from there. And once we finished watching the movie, I was left with two things: I loved the animation style that came with the movie. And I loved how the movie referenced the Super Mario games while adding a story to it. Firstly, the animation in the movie was (extremely) smooth and high-quality, considering how the entire film was all 3-D. Of course, I'm a (huge) fan of animations, so it would make sense that I would love to see animated movies on screen. And seeing how the Super Mario Movie was animated did, of course, excite me and left me interested to watch it. One of these examples was the fight scene between Mario and Donkey Kong. I loved the special effects that took place when Mario took the power-up that turned him into a cat and when he used his cat powers against Donkey Kong, thus becoming victorious, leaving the Donkey Kong army to join Mario, Peach, and Toad on the fight against Bowser. After watching the fight scene, it interested me to continue watching the movie to find out what happened next. And, of course, the rest of the scenes showed (some) references to some Super Mario games, which was (exactly) what Nintendo was going for. The movie had references to some Super Mario Games while it added a story. Of course, I am a (big) fan of Super Mario games, which became another reason why I got so interested and excited to watch the movie and to continue watching it. One of those references the movie brought up was Mario Kart, where Mario, Peach, Toad, and the Donkey Kong army were riding in their karts on a rainbow road to reach Bowser's kingdom to save Luigi and stop Bowser from taking over the Mushroom Kingdom. Another one of those references (that caught my eye when watching the movie) was Super Mario Odyssey, in terms of (most of) the marriage clothes Princess Peach and Bowser were wearing when they were about to get married. So, I found these two references to be good choices for making the movie exciting for Mario fans like me.
    Nintendo Super Fan Scholarship
    The first time I played Smash Bros Ultimate on the Nintendo Switch was in high school (when I was a freshman and then a sophomore). One of my good friends, Zavier, would always bring his Nintendo Switch to school and would usually play on his Switch during lunch. Of course, I would usually sit next to him during lunch and offer to play Smash Bros with him. But there was one tiny issue that sometimes made me lose and sometimes got me to (somehow) win, which was understanding how to use a character's attack. The only minor issue was that I didn't fully know how to work the controls on the joy cons or how to use the characters' attacks. For example, I mained as King Dedede (and still do alongside Kirby) and Lucario, even though I would sometimes win the pvp battles, sometimes without even realizing I won those battles. However, when another person joined in on the fun, who was my ex-friend, David, things for me and Zavier (mainly me) quickly changed. When David joined the table where me and Zavier were sitting, David offered to play Smash Bros with Zavier. I remember how fun it was to see the two boys play Smash Bros against each other, even though David kept talking politics after the boys stopped playing afterward. Sometimes, after David would stop playing with Zavier, it would be my turn to play against Zavier (which is when David would also try to talk to me about politics, so I would struggle to multitask at that point). Ever since that high school time with Zavier and David when I got the chance to play on the Nintendo Switch for the first time, and ever since I got the Nintendo Switch for one of my (belated) birthdays, I favored playing Smash Bros Ultimate, even when playing all by myself. Even after I got the Switch, I learned many things Smash Bros had, including Classic Mode and Adventure/Story Mode (Adventure/Story Mode turned out to be more addicting than Classic Mode).
    Book Lovers Scholarship
    When I was a senior in high school, one of the four books we read in English class was The Circle by David Eggers. I remember being super interested in that book, it got to the point where I made a one-page fan fiction relating to one of the scenes in that book (my English teacher liked it when I showed it to her). My fan fiction talked about how Mae, the main character, should have rebelled against Eamon, one of the founders of the company, instead of giving in. For context, one of those scenes in the book (which was the same scene in the fan fiction) was a conversation between Mae and Eamon about the company's policies and how Mae's crime on the dock (Mae was caught on camera stealing a kayak) could help Mae and strengthen the company. Not only did my liking for the book make me write a short fan fiction, but I liked the summary, symbolism, and suspense of the book. The Circle is about a woman named Mae who was offered a job at a technology company called The Circle. Mae was thrilled to work for The Circle once she accepted the offer. However, as she became more involved with the company, she soon realized the cost of living in a society where privacy is virtually non-existent, especially when Mae found out the company desires domination over everyone's lives once the circle "closes." I loved this summary because it explained the suspense of how the events would play out, and I felt suspenseful (almost) every time I read through the book. In addition, there was a lot of symbolism added to the suspense. After I read this book, I thought the company, The Circle, was a phone inside of a phone that was feeding off of everyone's information for the sake of technological advancement (e.g., A.I.), even when technology users voluntarily gave away personal information (i.e., The Circle was a cult in a sense). I loved this symbolism because in the world we are in now, technology and the internet have majorly advanced due to how much information we give out about ourselves and our lives.
    Minecraft Forever Fan Scholarship
    When I first played Minecraft as a young child, I was astonished by everything Minecraft offered. Then, when I first discovered creative mode, once I placed my first block in a default world (that first block was an oak plank), I quickly got a creativity boost. Since then, I have found it fun to make different buildings in creative mode, which has been my favorite aspect of Minecraft ever since. Sometimes, I would create buildings in a default world with the thought of making my own world. Most of the time, though, I would make some buildings in a flat world because it produces less clutter, which meant more space to build whatever I wanted. Playing in creative mode has allowed me to create any building that comes to mind, thus adding self-creativity and deepening my imagination. Playing in creative mode has allowed me to create whatever I could think of. That part of Minecraft resonates with me because it has over time boosted my creativity and added more scenarios to my imagination every time I opened Minecraft and built something new that I could think of. For example, I had, at one point, dreamt of owning an art school, and I mentally drafted a blueprint of what I wanted it to look like (I imagined it had many art classrooms, a dining area/lounge where players would first come in the building, a kitchen, and a gymnasium). After I drafted the interior, I built it in Minecraft. Once I finished building, I kept imagining all the positive things about what it would be like to own a school (e.g., how much fun people would have at that place). Since then, I had many different scenarios of different businesses I could own, thus leading to some thoughts about how those businesses would look if I were to build them in Minecraft. Playing Minecraft in creative mode and making buildings in a flat world is my favorite aspect of the game because creative mode offers limitless possibilities for anything I want to build and how I could create that building. That aspect wholly resonates with me because making buildings in Minecraft boosts my creativity and imagination, thus giving me more future ideas on what to build and what I want to do with my masterpieces.
    LiveYourDash Entrepreneurs Scholarship
    When I was a junior in high school, back in multimedia class, we had a project where we had to individually create envelopes, marketing posters, logos, mascots, business names, and mission statements to create a business from nothing. When I started on this project, I thought about a place where people could get fit and have a healthy life, which is where I came up with the name Emerald Fitness. That's when I had the inspiration to pursue a path of entrepreneurship. Being an entrepreneur allows me to be creative & to share that creativity with the world. Entrepreneurs can propose numerous ideas for their business(es) just like animators like me. Ever since my young childhood, I have always had the drive to make a variety of art, ranging from: painting disastrous masterpieces, drawing whatever came to mind, making short stories & books involving (mostly) non-human characters, to creating 3-D art via Source Filmmaker (SFM). When I started using Source Filmmaker, I didn't know where to start or what to do. That's where I had an old friend help me out. Ever since they helped me with the mechanics of SFM, I slowly started improving my SFM skills. When I got better at SFM, I shared my animations & posters with the internet. When I shared my posters & animations with the internet, I had other animators give me feedback on what I needed to fix to improve. However, when I was still a beginner at SFM, I was a perfectionist & had negative opinions of my work, which led me to take long hiatuses from using the program. Over time, however, I managed to improve my work & grow fond of my SFM skills. Entrepreneurs opening up their business(es) is like sharing art with the internet. Businesspeople can create whatever ideas come to mind and have detrimental opinions on how their ideas will persuade their customers to explore their business. The business project I made during my junior year of high school inspired me to become a future entrepreneur. Being an entrepreneur is like being an artist or an animator. Like numerous artists and animators, entrepreneurs can come up with ideas & draw out their plans until they are happy with what they have. After they come up with some ideas they have & manage their work, those entrepreneurs share their masterpiece(s) with their customers, getting feedback & overcoming obstacles as their masterpieces progress.
    I Can Do Anything Scholarship
    I think of my future self as someone who has a successful business; someone who has confidence in themselves and their environment; someone who is outgoing with their peers and friends; and someone who has mastery in digital media & design, computer science, and entrepreneurship.
    Book Lovers Scholarship
    "This is the Year I Put My Financial Life in Order," by John Schwartz, is about John and his wife, Jeanne, who go through financial ruin and poverty. Both John, Jeanne, and their kids make many mistakes (ex. Buying a house led to the family going through a lot in their neighborhood & most of their money getting sucked out of their wallets, so when they went to buy another house, they partially struggled. The fact that John was earning money from his dream job at Newsweek and that Jeanne also had another job wasn't helping much), but they learn through their experiences, research, and the help of numerous financial advisers. There is one thing I disliked about the book. Even though Schwartz wrote the chapters in order, it felt like I was jumping from one topic to another; it was not chronological, even though it was somewhat easy for me to know the summary of the chapters. But there are several things I liked about the book. I loved the punch lists at the end of every chapter, which gave me a reason to look back at the book and read through their advice for future reference. And I liked the long reference list they made at the end of their book because it gives the book credibility. Overall, I deem this book, "This is the Year I Put My Financial Life in Order," made by John Schwartz, one of my favorite books. It is truly one of the best memoirs and research-based books ever made, and I would highly recommend reading this book to those who plan to move out or are financially struggling.
    Taylor J. Paul Arts and Media Scholarship
    I chose to pursue a degree in digital media & design because I have done 3-D art & animation for six years. Even though I am passionate about digital media, my studies have made me interested in other things besides digital media, like entrepreneurship, business, and psychology. When I was a middle schooler, I looked at other 3-D animators whose animations inspired me to start animating. Then, in the fall of 2016, I started an animation program called Source Filmmaker. When I created basic animations and posters back then, I cared a lot about how perfect my animations and posters should be and how my creations were not good enough. I was also sensitive to feedback whenever I got them. And I compared myself with other animators and artists who had more experience than me, which demotivated me. Regardless, I made some animations and made them public. When I participated in collaborations (animators take part or parts of a song and animate for a certain number of seconds), my self-esteem dropped. That's when I believed I would not be good enough as an animator. Then, in 2017, I held off on animations and continued to work on posters. In 2019, however, I came back to animating. When I did, I became happier with my animation improvements despite my demotivation and my mental health. That's when other studies came into my life years later. While I am passionate about animation and digital media, my studies have partially changed my career goals. One of them being business & entrepreneurship. In multimedia design class in my third year of high school, one of the projects the students and I had to create was a fake business project. The students and I were supposed to design business cards, websites, envelopes, advertisement flyers, logos, and business mascots. And we were supposed to make up a business name and a mission statement for that business. This project has given me a career interest in business and entrepreneurship. I wanted to make that business project a real business in the future. But once I started college, I got interested in psychology. Recently, I got interested in learning about mental health and why people do some actions or act a certain way. At one point, I said I wanted to major in psychology, but according to my mom, getting a job in that area is difficult. That's why I'm taking psychology as an interest rather than a career. I have done 3-D art and animation for a few years. And several animators on the Internet inspired me to take on this career as an animator, hence my passion for digital media. However, that passion partially changed when I explored and studied other topics like entrepreneurship, business, and psychology. My desire for animation will not change. But I will take into account other careers in my life in the future.
    Alicea Sperstad Rural Writer Scholarship
    Writing has been a part of most of my life. It makes me feel at ease whether I'm writing a book or journaling events from my life. Writing lets my creativity flow and allows me to express how I have felt in the past and how I feel. I have written books since elementary school. I remember collaborating with one of my former classmates on short stories I would write based on the toys I had played with at my old home. I would write short stories, and then my former classmate and I would make a play out of them. I even wrote my first (unfinished) book, "Great Dane Middle School: Stressed Out." Then, during my first year in high school, I wrote another (unfinished) short story. This story deals with longtime toxic friendships. In that short story, the main character, Clairie, or Claire for short, is known as an academically successful student in high school, with her boyfriend named Jackson, her friends Izzy, Vivi, and Nali, and her toxic best friend named Lindia. My now unfinished short story talks about how Lindia would always stop Clairie in the halls to play the victim and verbally harass her, which had lasted throughout elementary, middle, and high school. When Clairie had enough, she collaborated with Vivi on a plan to make Lindia pay the price, and then, both Vivi and Clairie got Izzy and Nali involved in that plan. However, when Clairie gets to Lindia, Lindia gets angry and tells Clairie she plans to get revenge on her. These stories gave me opportunities to let my creativity flow through my writing. I went through not-so-great friendships back in middle school, which inspired me to create this book. But my storytelling goes way beyond just writing books. I have an unhealthy habit of talking to myself using my external voice, ranging from past events that hurt me to plans on how I would design my book and animation characters and their backstories. Usually, whenever I am in public, I whisper to myself, which has slowly damaged me over time. I remember my mom recently suggesting that I write down what goes on in my mind to reduce the mental clutter. Since then, I have found some night times where I would write down how I was feeling and what I was thinking. Writing plays a significant part in my life because it allows me to express my creativity and ease my way into having a confident sense of self and improved life. Being creative and expressing my feelings & experiences have led me to understand myself and my environment. Writing books and journaling have allowed me to see more opportunities for the future. I hope that by continuing to write books and journal my life, I will understand myself better and show the world who I am.
    Elevate Mental Health Awareness Scholarship
    I am very empathic and sensitive, so I would take a lot of words, situations, and actions to heart, even though I know I should not be doing that. I would also find it hard to avoid seeking external validation, comparing myself to others, apologizing (even when it is not my fault), and second-guessing myself. And I was a big people pleaser, which means that I spent my time trying to please people by constantly giving people gifts or my support, even if I got little to none in return from the other person or other people. Some obstacles I faced as a highly sensitive person (HSP) & as an empath were people being needy of my presence, taking advantage of me, and people using me to do certain things I did not want to do. I mainly had a hard time saying "no" when it came to playing with my friends or supporting people and being there for them because of the fear that my friends or other people would make me feel bad about myself or abandon me. I acknowledged that it would not matter if I gave a present out of kindness or gratitude. I would not get anything in return. I realize that most people in this world are takers, not givers. And that if I stayed silent about certain things, like some of my talents or achievements, people would not care about or acknowledge them. Relationship-wise, I realized that people take advantage of me, use me, or ditch me for whatever reason, and I realized the only way to get through it is to set boundaries. I started this animation program called Source Filmmaker in the fall of 2016. When I created basic animations and posters back then, I cared a lot about how perfect my animations and posters should be and how my creations were not good enough. I was also sensitive to feedback whenever I got them. And I compared myself with other animators and artists who had more experience than me, which demotivated me. Regardless, I made some animations and made them public. When I participated in collaborations (animators take part or parts of a song and animate for a certain number of seconds), my low self-esteem grew. That's when I knew I would never be good enough as an animator. Then, in 2017, I held off on animation and continued to work on posters. In 2019, however, I came back to animating, except I felt demotivated to continue animating. I stole ideas from a couple of animators. One of those times led to conflict. And that was when I eventually realized. I demolished my reputation as an animator. I have grown to be an experienced 3D animator & I have been slowly learning to stand up for myself. This experience as an animator led me to believe throughout my animation career that it doesn't matter if my creations are not what I imagine them to be or if my designs are not like what every animation in the world is supposed to be. I should still show it to people so I could get feedback and improve as an animator and an artist. And another experience as an HSP led me to understand that I don't need anyone to control the things I do in life or get on my skin. I need people who will respect my strengths and weaknesses and for me to love myself for who I am.
    Lifelong Learning Scholarship
    Learning has very significant importance to me. Firstly, it allows me to understand the world around me. Secondly, it lets me see the bigger picture in numerous situations and how I can improve myself. Finally, it allows me to learn more about myself and how I can manage my struggles and my weaknesses. For example, one of the things I have learned recently is how to set boundaries. I am an empath and a highly sensitive person (HSP), which means that I am also a people pleaser, so I would take a lot of words, situations, and actions to heart, even though I know I should not be taking these things personally. I dealt with people being needy of my presence, taking advantage of me, and people using me to do certain things I did not want to do. For instance, I had an online friend who was, a few years ago, needy of my activity and my presence. Whenever I said I did not want to play with them, even if I had a reason not to, they would play the victim to get me to change my mind. Whenever they crossed the line after a while of being needy, and I would want to stop being their friend, they would try to victimize themselves to get me to give them another chance, which has made me angry at myself. This experience has made me understand that I had to set boundaries, personally and publicly. I watch numerous educational videos, like TEDx Talks and Khan Academy. I also learn through college classes and reading books. And I use my parents as my resources and my helping hands. So, I plan on using videos, college classes, my parents, and literature to continue learning. By winning this scholarship, I intend to pay for my tuition, fees, and books next semester or the semester after next semester. So, by winning this scholarship, I will ease myself into student debt after college graduation, so I will focus on my education and reduce the financial burden. And by winning this scholarship, I will manage to expand my college education, so I can continue learning for my future. Learning allows me to grow and become mentally stronger. One of the things I learned in life is to manage to set boundaries. And I plan to continue learning throughout my life through educational videos, college classes, my parents, and books of any kind.
    Learner Math Lover Scholarship
    When it comes to financial situations in the real world and making decisions about what I need or want, it would be vital to use mathematics, like figuring out how much the car payment is (and what the APR is) or what job has a higher raise. I stumbled upon a math problem where two companies have a starting point of $75,000. Happy Co. has a $4000 raise each year & Joyful Inc. has a 5% raise each year. I needed to find out which job offer I would take using an arithmetic sequence. These are a couple of examples of how I would use word problems in the real world. Not only is math helpful for numerous real-world situations, but it is also fun to solve mathematical problems and challenge myself. I love the idea of expanding my knowledge on issues I may need to use throughout my life. I would have difficulties understanding some math topics, like geometry, which allows me to expand my ability to take on that knowledge. By winning this scholarship, I intend to pay for my tuition, fees, and books next semester. I am taking a college algebra class and learning high school statistics & personal finance outside of school. By having this scholarship, I will ease myself from student debt after graduation, allowing me to focus on my education and reduce the financial burden. I love math because solving real-world mathematical problems helps me and will help me make financial and social decisions along the way, and math makes it fun to challenge me and learn something new. Understanding new types of math will expand my knowledge and my ability to learn, which provides a basis for focus and helps me cover other areas of life. Mathematics may not be able to help me all the time, but I need to learn it while I can.
    Karl Baehr Entrepreneurs Scholarship
    In multimedia design class in my third year of high school, one of the projects the students and I had to create was a fake business project. The students and I were supposed to design business cards, websites, envelopes, advertisement flyers, logos, and business mascots. And we were supposed to make up a business name and a mission statement for that business. I designed business cards, envelopes, advertisement posters, and logos. I also created a website and a business mascot that resonated with my forthcoming company, named Emerald Fitness. Emerald Fitness is a wellness studio that will feature an indoor & outdoor sports complex, a cardio room, a strength room, a spa room, and some classes (health, technology, art, yoga, meditation, and dance). Art, dance, and technology classes will include topics like painting, drawing, Zumba, ballet, and animation. I thought about starting this business because, a long time ago, my mom was a nurse and took medical school in Macedonia. And my dad is a sports fanatic and was in a school for sports in Macedonia. So, my dad would teach me a few activities like swimming, where I took high school swimming for all four years, and tennis, where my dad and I would play tennis recreationally. And I took sports medicine class in my second year & fourth year of high school, where I learned about the names of the muscles and how to treat injuries in a sports environment. I also took biology classes in my first year & fourth year of high school, where I went in-depth with muscle anatomy, muscle physiology, and bone anatomy. I also learned about the systems in the human body and different body illnesses. With this scholarship, I intend to pay for my tuition, fees, and books next semester. I am at the moment taking an intro to business class and will plan to take an entrepreneurship class next semester. By having this scholarship, I will ease myself from student debt after college graduation so I can focus on my education and reduce the financial burden, which would help me further my business and make it beneficial for me & everyone. My future business, Emerald Fitness, would be about physical wellness and community involvement. Opening up Emerald Fitness would be a local benefit for the community & my passion will help Emerald Fitness thrive, which is essential for any business in the world.
    Sloane Stephens Doc & Glo Scholarship
    I am an empath and a highly sensitive person (HSP). I am very empathic and sensitive, so I would take a lot of words, situations, and actions to heart, even though I know I should not be doing that. But being an empath and a highly sensitive person (HSP) can allow me to empathize with people and determine their body language, words, tone, and actions. For instance, I can discover if someone is lying based on their manner and body language. I can also channel my feelings through the use of experiences and then turn them into art, like posters or writings. And I can powerfully feel everything, so I can be either at my highest low or high since I'm very in tune with my feelings and emotions. These characteristics I have as an HSP will allow me to strengthen my relationships with my friends & family and to see the world through different lenses, which means that by learning from others and experiences, I will improve as a person and help others in need. And I am an artist & animator. I started this animation program called Source Filmmaker in the fall of 2016. When I created basic animations and posters back then, I cared a lot about how perfect my animations and posters should be and how my creations were not good enough. I was also sensitive to feedback whenever I got them. And I compared myself with other animators and artists who had more experience than me, which demotivated me. Regardless, I made some animations and made them public. When I participated in collaborations (animators take part or parts of a song and animate for a certain number of seconds), my low self-esteem grew. That's when I knew I would never be good enough as an animator. Then, in 2017, I held off on animation and continued to work on posters. In 2019, however, I came back to animating, except I was feeling demotivated to continue animating. Being generally creative is a quality I value the most. I can expressively create ideas from emotions or the environment, construct different ways to do certain things, make decisions based on my feelings, embrace my fears & inner critics, and make connections with myself & others. If I continued being creative throughout my journey, I would show the world what I have done and can do through my animations & art and open myself up to many different options.
    Ethel Hayes Destigmatization of Mental Health Scholarship
    For a long time, I have suffered from low self-esteem. I am very empathic and sensitive, so I would take a lot of words, situations, and actions to heart, even though I know I should not be doing that. I would also find it hard to avoid seeking external validation, comparing myself to others, apologizing (even when it is not my fault), and second-guessing myself. And I was a big people pleaser, which means that I spent my time trying to please people by constantly giving people gifts or my support, even if I got little to none in return from the other person or other people. Some obstacles I faced as a highly sensitive person (HSP) & as an empath were people being needy of my presence, taking advantage of me, and people using me to do certain things I did not want to do. I mainly had a hard time saying "no" when it came to playing with my friends or supporting people and being there for them because of the fear that my friends or other people would make me feel bad about myself or abandon me. I acknowledged that it would not matter if I gave a present out of kindness or gratitude. I would not get anything in return. I realize that most people in this world are takers, not givers. And that if I stayed silent about certain things, like some of my talents or achievements, people would not care or acknowledge it. Relationship-wise, I realized that there are people who will take advantage of me, use me, or ditch me for whatever reason. But I realized the only way to get better is to set boundaries. I started this animation program called Source Filmmaker in the fall of 2016. When I created basic animations and posters back then, I cared a lot about how perfect my animations and posters should be and how my creations were not good enough. I was also sensitive to feedback whenever I got them. And I compared myself with other animators and artists who had more experience than me, which demotivated me. Regardless, I made some animations and made them public. When I participated in collaborations (animators take part or parts of a song and animate for a certain number of seconds), my low self-esteem grew. That's when I knew I would never be good enough as an animator. Then, in 2017, I held off on animation and continued to work on posters. In 2019, however, I came back to animating, except I was feeling demotivated to continue animating. I stole ideas from a couple of animators. One of those times led to conflict. And that was when I eventually realized. I demolished my reputation as an animator. Career-wise, this experience led me to believe, over time, that it doesn't matter if my creations are not like what I imagine them to be or if my designs are not like what every animation in the world is supposed to be. I should still show it to people so I could get feedback and improve as an animator and an artist.
    Elevate Mental Health Awareness Scholarship
    For a long time, I have suffered from low self-esteem. I am very empathic and sensitive, so I would take a lot of words, situations, and actions to heart, even though I know I should not be doing that. I would also find it hard to avoid seeking external validation, comparing myself to others, apologizing (even when it is not my fault), and second-guessing myself. And I was a big people pleaser, which means that I spent my time trying to please people by constantly giving people gifts or my support, even if I got little to none in return from the other person or other people. Some obstacles I faced as a highly sensitive person (HSP) & as an empath were people being needy of my presence, taking advantage of me, and people using me to do certain things I did not want to do. I mainly had a hard time saying "no" when it came to playing with my friends or supporting people and being there for them because of the fear that my friends or other people would make me feel bad about myself or abandon me. I acknowledged that it would not matter if I gave a present out of kindness or gratitude. I would not get anything in return. I realize that most people in this world are takers, not givers. And that if I stayed silent about certain things, like some of my talents or achievements, people would not care or acknowledge it. Relationship-wise, I realized that there are people who will take advantage of me, use me, or ditch me for whatever reason. But I realized the only way to get better is to set boundaries. I started this animation program called Source Filmmaker in the fall of 2016. When I created basic animations and posters back then, I cared a lot about how perfect my animations and posters should be and how my creations were not good enough. I was also sensitive to feedback whenever I got them. And I compared myself with other animators and artists who had more experience than me, which demotivated me. Regardless, I made some animations and made them public. When I participated in collaborations (animators take part or parts of a song and animate for a certain number of seconds), my low self-esteem grew. That's when I knew I would never be good enough as an animator. Then, in 2017, I held off on animation and continued to work on posters. In 2019, however, I came back to animating, except I was feeling demotivated to continue animating. I stole ideas from a couple of animators. One of those times led to conflict. And that was when I eventually realized. I demolished my reputation as an animator. Career-wise, this experience led me to believe, over time, that it doesn't matter if my creations are not like what I imagine them to be or if my designs are not like what every animation in the world is supposed to be. I should still show it to people so I could get feedback and improve as an animator and an artist.
    Mind, Body, & Soul Scholarship
    For a long time, I have suffered from low self-esteem. I am very empathic and sensitive, so I would take a lot of words, situations, and actions to heart, even though I know I should not be doing that. I would also find it hard to avoid seeking external validation, comparing myself to others, apologizing (even when it is not my fault), and second-guessing myself. And I was a big people pleaser, which means that I spent my time trying to please people by constantly giving people gifts or my support, even if I got little to none in return from the other person or other people. Some obstacles I faced as a highly sensitive person (HSP) & as an empath were people being needy of my presence, taking advantage of me, and people using me to do certain things I did not want to do. I mainly had a hard time saying "no" when it came to playing with my friends or supporting people and being there for them because of the fear that my friends or other people would make me feel bad about myself or abandon me. Some hobbies that will help me sustain a healthy mind are practicing gratitude, reading books, trying new things, setting short-term & long-term goals, leaving certain negative places, and planning my ideas before working on a project. Some more things I did to sustain a healthy mind is asking my family and school faculty for help. And some things I did to maintain a healthful soul are meditating and doing yoga. I believe that mentally and spiritually, acquiring strength will make me feel better about my surroundings. For instance, it will help me see the world through different lenses, strengthen my relationships with my friends and loved ones, and learn how to say "no." Some things I have done to maintain a healthy body are working out, stretching, and going to the gym. I believe that physically, getting stronger will make me feel better about myself and help me improve my body image. And a few things that exhilarate me a lot about college is that college will have a new environment. College will be costly and more stressful than high school, and it will be challenging for me to do numerous things myself. Despite the disadvantages, the college will give me the advantage to start making new friends, experiencing new things, gaining a better education, and learning how to live independently. The college will also give me the advantage of mentally challenging myself, which will help me build my self-esteem through overcoming obstacles.